A woman receives support, hope, and healing from her new church family.

“When you have nothing left, all you have is God.”

That’s how Valerie Frecks, member at Grace, Sahuarita, Ariz., summarized the most difficult years of her life. With support and encouragement from her church family, however, Valerie went from surviving to thriving.

Growing up

Valerie grew up in an Army family, which meant that she moved quite a bit. “It was just me, my brother, my parents, and the Army family,” she shares. “We did not really grow up with religion. We said grace at dinner, but we didn’t go to church and there was no Bible reading.”

Valerie got married when she was 20, and she and her husband moved to Arizona. Soon they were expecting their first child. “I told my husband, ‘Maybe we should go to church. We really need to do something.’ ” Valerie says the churches she attended had some Bible readings in their services, but they were ultimately focused on making people feel good when they went to church.

Valerie and her husband went on to have two more children. During this time, Valerie was working at a day care center. “I did that so I’d get to be with my kids,” she says. “My kids went to work with me, and I got to raise my kids.”

Dealing with loss

About ten years later, Valerie says things began to fall apart. She and her husband were having marital problems, and she learned that her dad was dying. Valerie had already lost her mom at a young age, and her grandparents and aunts and uncles had passed away as well.

“I loaded up the kids and drove to Texas to say my good-byes,” she remembers, but her husband didn’t come. “After the funeral, I came home, and my husband told me our marriage was over. I felt so alone.” Valerie says she tried reaching out to some people at church, “but everyone I was close with didn’t want the burden of the divorce. It seemed like my divorce didn’t fit into their lifestyle.

“I felt like I had nobody left. I remember thinking, Maybe this is where I need to turn to God. God, you have to help me out. I don’t know what to do. I don’t have parents to help me anymore. I have nobody to help me. I’m all alone.”

The turning point

Around this time, Valerie says she saw postings from Grace Lutheran Church about its new worship facility and child learning center that would be opening soon in Sahuarita.

She wasn’t happy with her current job, so she sent an e-mail to get more information. She heard back from Laura Heiman, the director. “But I never responded to her e-mail,” says Valerie. “Change is scary. I wasn’t happy at the center I was working at, but I was comfortable. I thought to myself, I cannot go through another change right now.”

A few weeks later, however, Laura followed up with another e-mail—and that made Valerie think: With all of the other people who applied, what made her want to e-mail me back and ask if I was still interested? Valerie decided to meet with Laura and tour the facility.

Laura said they had filled most of the positions, but they were still looking for help in the two-year-old room. “And for the last 14 years, that’s what I had been doing!” says Valerie. “It’s like God was laying everything out for me.”

Valerie took the job and began working at Grace when the center opened in September 2020. “It was so different,” she says. “It was very small and had a family feel.” She was amazed by the support and genuine care that she received from her coworkers. When Valerie told them about her divorce, one of them wrote a thoughtful card with Bible passages. Another invited her to church. “It was the first church service in the new building, and I said I’d go, because I wanted to get back into [going to church],” she recalls.

Valerie says the first thing she noticed at the service was the simple worship style. “It was just a piano playing and hymns being sung. There was no big band and lights and singers. The focus was simply singing together and praising God.” She also recalls the warm welcome she received. “Everyone was so nice and wanted to say hi and meet me.” That service made an impression on Valerie, and she started attending Grace regularly.

Feeling like family

Valerie’s youngest son, Kade, was ten at the time. Since there were not many kids at the center due to COVID, Valerie’s coworkers asked if Kade wanted to come to the after-school program. Kade enjoyed helping the younger kids in the program, and the learning center staff enjoyed having him there.

When football season rolled around, Kade was excited to play, but after everything that had happened in their family, Valerie had some tough news to deliver. “I had to tell Kade that his dad wouldn’t be there to watch him play,” says Valerie. Their disappointment turned to joy, however, when they arrived at the game. Many of Valerie’s coworkers—including Laura and her husband, Pastor Ryan Heiman—were there to cheer for Kade.

“They all showed up, and they were so glad to support him,” Valerie remembers. “Kade asked me, ‘Mom, are they all here for me?’ We couldn’t believe it. Where else could you find a church with that kind of support? They gave up their Saturday just to be there. After that moment, I wanted to go through membership and be a part of this.”

A series of firsts

When Valerie started taking membership classes, the learning center staff helped cover her classroom so she could attend for an hour during the day. “The classes were just so informative,” she says. Valerie learned about what Lutherans believe, the meaning of the commandments, and teachings like the Holy Trinity. “It was a ten-week class that covered everything. They truly care and want you to know and love God,” she says. “It was interesting that they don’t change ‘rules’ to keep up with society. At Grace, it’s ‘this is what the Bible says.’ ”

All of Valerie’s kids were baptized and took catechism classes. “As a parent I want nothing more than my kids to have a relationship with God,” she says. “I was lost for a while, and I don’t want them to ever experience that.” Valerie remembers how special it was when she helped her kids with their confirmation essays and how joyful it was the first time they could receive Communion together. “Communion is such an intimate thing,” she says. “To finally go up, all of us, and take it together—it was such an overwhelming feeling.”

Around this time, Valerie started dating her current husband, Tim. “When things were getting serious, I told him that if we want to keep this going, we need to go to church on Sundays. So he went with me, and he said, ‘Never in a million years did I think I’d be going to church on Sunday.’ ” When they got engaged, Tim went through Bible information class and also became a member at Grace.

They were married in 2024—the first wedding at the new church. “I knew I wanted to be married in our church with everyone who loved and supported us,” says Valerie. “What was amazing was the support from my [coworkers] and everyone who helped us have the most perfect day! I had people from every walk of my life. And to be surrounded by people who prayed over our marriage was amazing.”

Thriving

Valerie says it’s great to see her family becoming more involved and connected at Grace. “My husband just loves being around people and being at church.” Valerie says he is starting to recognize more hymns, “and when we’re talking, he tells me, ‘We should pray about it.’ That’s something he never thought he’d be saying.”

The kids are also active in the congregation. They’re part of a teen group at Grace, and they’re finding opportunities to invite their friends to church. “My daughter is part of a community service group at school, and she asks people if they want to do their service hours at our church,” says Valerie. “We always have lunch and a devotion—so once a month, all these kids come and hear God’s Word.”

Valerie is growing too. She is now a lead teacher at the learning center and plans to enroll in the online continuing education program for early childhood educators (see sidebar below) now available through Martin Luther College, New Ulm, Minn. This year she also attended the Lutheran Women’s Missionary Society convention and the WELS Education Conference with her director, Laura. “She is a ray of sunshine,” says Valerie. “Laura and I have become very close, and it was fun sharing those experiences together.”

Reflecting on her journey, Valerie said everything that happened was part of God’s plan to get her to where she needed to be. “When God says something is going to happen, it’s going to happen,” she says. “From my beginning of just feeling so lost to God laying everything out for me—it’s been such a blessing. It’s just amazing.”

Four tiers of support

Martin Luther College (MLC) now offers a flexible online continuing education program designed for early childhood educators. Adult learners looking to transition into or advance their qualifications in early childhood education can enter and exit the program at any of its four stackable tiers, which include online professional development modules, instruction and prep for Child Development Associate credentialing, WELS ministry certification, and an Associate of Science in Early Childhood Education (ECE).

MLC’s four tiers of support for ECE teachers provide schools and churches with a framework for investing in their educators, reducing staff turnover, and encouraging long-term ministry.

Learn more at mlc-wels.edu/continuing-education/four-tiers.

Author: Alicia A. Neumann
Volume 112, Number 09
Issue: September 2025