It hurts my heart that this topic is prevalent enough that we all need to be prepared to address it. I’m thankful that two Christian mental health professionals with experience in this area can help equip those of us who feel helpless in the face of such a serious situation.

Nicole Balza

I RECENTLY listened to a podcast about the challenges young people face today. One contributor recalled a high school party she wasn’t invited to. Back then, she only found out the following week at school. Sure, it still stung, but her weekend was likely filled with pleasant things like family, work, or rest.

Today’s teens don’t get that luxury. When they’re excluded, they watch it unfold in real time—Snapchats, Instagram stories, videos of friends laughing and dancing—without them. It’s not just missing out; it’s visible exclusion. And that can be a dark, lonely place.

This isn’t another article railing against social media. Your kids have heard that sermon already. Instead, I want to encourage you to enter your child’s pain with open ears and a soft heart. Whether it’s exclusion, rejection, or the weight of anxiety and sadness, you can’t afford to dismiss your child’s hurt. For some, that pain deepens into thoughts of self-harm or suicide.

So what can you do? Start here: LISTEN. LISTEN. And then LISTEN AGAIN.

1. Listen with curiosity. Ask gentle, open-ended questions. Don’t assume you know what your child is going through—teen pain often looks different from what you remember. You might think, “There is nothing new under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 1:9)—and in one sense, you’d be right. But for your child, this might be the biggest hurt he or she has faced. Ask what it’s like to miss the party. Ask where it hurts. Don’t rush to fix or explain. Give your child space to speak and offer the gift of your presence—compassionate, patient, and unhurried.
2. Listen with compassion. When your child opens up, resist the urge to fix it. Fixing things quickly might ease your discomfort, but this moment is not about you—it’s about being present in your child’s pain. Slow down. Reflect, validate, and stay in it with your child. You don’t have to agree with everything; you just have to stay. “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn” (Romans 12:15). Jesus did this. Before he revived Lazarus, he wept. Before he taught, he sat beside. Follow his lead.
3. Listen to clarify your prayer. You don’t have to carry this weight alone. Philippians 4:6 reminds us: “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” Pray for your child. Pray with your child. Your child’s name was on Jesus’ mind when Jesus gave his life. And your name was too.

One final thought. Read Psalm 73. Read it with curiosity, with empathy. Read it with your child. Ask if Asaph’s hurt sounds like his or her hurt. Ask if Asaph’s hope could be his or her hope too.

You and your child are in the hands of a gracious God. And that’s a good place to be.

Greg Lyon

AS PARENTS, we do everything we can to protect our children. We follow closely behind when they climb on the playground. We awkwardly run beside them as they practice riding a bicycle without training wheels. We meet their friends and their parents to make sure they are surrounded by positive influences. But what happens when our children experience danger that can no longer be monitored with our five senses? What if the danger resides in themselves?

At different times in their lives, our children may be fighting a battle internally that we cannot see. There has been a resounding question, rooted in fear, that has been asked of me more and more often in recent years. How do I help a child who is having suicidal thoughts? It’s a valid question because these thoughts happen often in adolescents. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, suicide is the second leading cause of death among adolescents and young adults.¹ That statistic has been consistent for decades.

We all have cognitive distortions—thought patterns that are emotionally based that alter the way in which we interact with the world around us. A simple example of a cognitive distortion is thinking that a friend is upset with you when he or she does not respond to a text in a way that you expected. But yet when you talk with your friend you realize his or her experience of that interaction was the opposite of yours. Your friend is not upset with you and did not even realize that you would have any reason to worry that he or she would be! Your thoughts played a trick on you. They convinced you that your reality was different than it really was.

Cognitive distortions can be dangerous because they change the way we see the world and the people around us. If our children lack the tools to identify and challenge those thoughts, their emotions can quickly spiral out of control. I have some worksheets² that can help identify and challenge these thoughts.

Most suicidal ideation is rooted in cognitive distortions—the world is not seen exactly as it matches up in reality. This can intensify the emotional response and lead to a sense of hopelessness and despair. Evidence shows that individuals who attempt or complete suicide see it as their only solution in a world where there is no hope.

Can you see why the final part of that sentence is distorted? Our faith proves that the idea of a world without hope is false. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead” (1 Peter 1:3, emphasis added). It’s easy to remember the hope we find in Jesus when we are thinking clearly and feeling good, but can you remember a time when it was not so easy for you to recall this in a moment of trial or tribulation? I bet you can go back to that moment and identify a distorted thought that was present.

The world is scary, and as parents we want to do everything in our power to protect our children. In times of uncertainty, lean into God’s promise and reassurance that he is present at all times for our children. He will protect them far beyond our ability.

Katie Chavez

¹nimh.nih.gov/health/statistics/suicide

²For more information on cognitive distortions, see these worksheets:

For elementary and middle school: https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/cbt-thinking-errors

For adolescents and adults: https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/cognitive-distortions

Challenging thoughts: https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/challenging-negative-thoughts

Reframing thoughts: https://www.therapistaid.com/worksheets/automatic-thoughts

Author: Multiple
Volume 112, Number 07
Issue: July 2025

Action steps

Here are five steps to help someone experiencing suicidal thoughts and/or behaviors:

1. Ask. Inquire directly, “Are you thinking about suicide?” This shows you’re open to discussing it in a caring, non-judgmental way.
2. Be present. Whether it’s being physically there, chatting on the phone, or offering support in other ways, your presence matters. Listen actively to understand the individual’s thoughts and feelings.
3. Ensure safety. Take steps to limit access to potentially lethal items or locations. While it can be challenging, asking about a person’s plans and removing dangerous means can be crucial for his or her safety. Keep a line of sight; this is especially important for parents with teens/kids.
4. Facilitate connections. Support the individual in accessing professional and community resources. Offer to help reach out to trusted individuals like family members, friends, spiritual advisors, or mental health professionals.
5. Follow up. After providing immediate support, check in later to see how the person is doing and offer continued support.

Reprinted from christianliferesources.com

Learn more at christianliferesources.com/suicide-prevention.